🍺 The Most Interesting Geocacher in the World 🍻 Mystery Cache
🍺 The Most Interesting Geocacher in the World 🍻
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Difficulty:
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Terrain:
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Size: 
(small)
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Who is this mysterious Geocacher? Little is known about him, but I do happen to know the following facts:
-He never says something tastes like chicken – not even chicken.
-If a monument were built in his honor, Mt. Rushmore would close… due to poor attendance.
-His cereal never gets soggy. It sits there, staying crispy, just for him.
-He’s a lover, not a fighter, but he’s also a fighter, so don’t get any ideas.
-He lives vicariously through himself.
-He has amassed an incredibly large DVD library, and it is said that he never once alphabetized it.
-His shirts never wrinkle.
-He doesn’t believe in using oven mitts, nor potholders.
-If he were to mail a letter without postage, it would still get there.
-He once taught a German shepherd to bark in Spanish.
-His reputation is expanding faster than the universe.
-He owns three sports cars and rents five.
-On every continent in the world, there is a sandwich named after him.
-He’s been known to cure narcolepsy, just by walking into a room.
-He is left-handed. And right-handed.
Update: As of 10/15/2017 the cache has been moved. the puzzle has been updated to reflect the new coord offset. But previous solvers can still enter the old solution to certitude to receive the new coords.
Further Update: As of 9/27/2020 I had to rework the puzzle to reflect more accurate coordinates. I'm not sure what happened exactly. In any case, if you have either of the old solutions you can enter them into certitude for the updated coords.
You can validate your puzzle solution with certitude.
(Difficulty due to combination of puzzle, hide, and potential muggle activity)
On 6/17/13 this puzzle happened to be featured on teamajk's Geocaching Puzzle of the Day! 
Congratulations on another Deadley FTF, and Merry Christmas!
Additional Hints
(Decrypt)
Chmmyr: Uvf 10 Tnyyba Ung ubyqf "30" Tnyybaf.