It has happened again. Early this morning at the scene of a serious
traffic crash involving a dump truck that left the roadway at a
high rate of speed, struck several trees and overturned on Osceola
Road in Geneva, an unknown hero, dubbed the Good Samaritan,
appeared and saved the day. A passing reporter happened upon the
scene just in the nick of time and was able to conduct a short but
telling interview with Seminole County’s newest superhero.
The following is an excerpt from the interview and is told in the
magnificent hero’s own words:
“There I was, driving down the road in my mighty stallion
when I saw the truck lying on its side in the woods. I immediately
knew what I had to do. I quickly jumped out of my car and sauntered
over to the wreck (Sauntering is an excellent way to approach an
emergency as it gives someone else who is better prepared a chance
to arrive and get there first). Upon reaching the vehicle, I
quickly scanned the area and realized that no one better prepared
had arrived so I leaped into action. I climbed up onto the truck
and leaned through the window. I scanned the interior of the truck,
which appeared to be empty. Suddenly a voice spoke to me and asked
for help. I was startled as one normally doesn’t hear voices
coming from an empty truck. Then I was relieved when I realized
that the driver had slid down and was wedged underneath the dash on
the passenger side of the vehicle. I asked how he was doing. The
voice said that he was doing fine considering he was bent into the
shape of a pretzel and felt like a sardine in a can. I told him
that I was going to check under the hood (I do not know what to
look for under the hood but I have observed many competent persons
do this when faced with a vehicle problem). The voice told me to go
ahead if it would make me feel better. I checked under the hood,
which took considerably longer than I thought it would since I
could not find it as it was a couple of hundred feet away, laying
under a tree. Not finding anything of interest, I was struck with
an inspiration. I retrieved a blanket from my car and climbed back
into the truck. I told the voice that I was going to wrap him in a
blanket to prevent shock. I then climbed inside the vehicle and
proceeded to tuck the blanket around the victim. I could tell by
the faint muffled mmpphh’s that he was appreciative. Just as
I was finished I heard noises and yelling. Suddenly a voice yelled,
“He’s over here in the truck.” I was suddenly
grabbed by the legs and pulled from the vehicle. Before I could say
a word, I was strapped to a gurney and placed in an ambulance. I
heard, “Jesus, look at his face! Don’t worry pal.
Plastic surgeons can do amazing things these days!” Another
voice yelled, “There is nothing else in the truck but a
ruffled blanket.” During the midst of the commotion, I was
able to work myself loose and make my way back to my car where I
ran into you.”
The Paul Harvey “Rest of the Story” is that the
driver of the vehicle was found by an observant worker at the
wrecking yard and was transported to ORMC. The only comment he
would make to reporters was that he would give anything to know the
identity of the Good Samaritan who had aided him. The identity of
the Good Samaritan may fade into history as he was last seen
fleeing the scene in a dark single colored auto with personalized
Florida Tag MDLIII. The only other clue is a piece of paper found
in the overturned truck with the following letters:
Qparg rcmon awhk xviwx tfkrd ndztd wvgyt ilybh quvhi tfkrr pkauv
hnxwf bfkah nqhmo narmb rhhkx viwkw zzrgx ircdw vggvv rlbhq uvhwa
pzkrr ayviq uvhnx woawl
The FTF prize is a bottle of Scotch that was recently brought
back from England. The prize is not at the cache site. The winner
will have to meet with me in person so that I can verify that the
winner is 21 years of ago or older.
