I dreamed I saw St. Augustine, and he said to me, "Thou
believest thou art wise, yet I will test thee with three
conundrums. Shed light on these if thou canst."
"Ask your first, for I am ready," I replied.
"How much chuck would a woodchuck wood if a woodchuck could wood
chuck?"
"I cannot answer nonsense, for I am but a man," I replied.
"Weighed in the balance, thy reply is found wanting," he
continued. "But perhaps this question is more to thy liking: How
much faint would the painted desert paint if the painted desert
could faint paint?"
"Yet again you test me with meaningless nonsense," I
replied.
"And again, thy reply is wanting," said he. "And now for the
final question that will determine thy fate. How many guards would
a guardrail guard, if a guardrail could guard guards?"
"This is grim maddness," I screamed.
"Yes," he answered. "Madness of the most refined sort. Guard
RaIl Madness."
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