Hide It and They Will Come Traditional Cache
Nomex: No response from owner. If you wish to repair/replace the cache sometime in the future, just contact us (by email), and assuming it meets the current guidelines, we'll be happy to unarchive it.
Hide It and They Will Come
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Difficulty:
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Terrain:
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Size: 
(not chosen)
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Will cachers go after a hide if they know in advance that it sucks? There’s only one way to find out…
I've wanted to do one like this for some time now. It's dedicated to all the hiders out there who toss a cheesy cache in a location of no significance just because they can. I am hoping to beat them at their own game.
I wasn’t able to get all the elements of lameness crammed into a single hide but there are enough here to make it a real stinker…
Crappy location: Yep!
No real vista view here either, just A few horses and maybe a feral cat or two. If you visit in the afternoon on a sunny day - BREATH DEEPLY! And then let me know what you think that smell is.
Bad coordinates: Hey, it was the best reading I could get when I passed by the spot.
Bad GPS reception in the area: The signal is pretty bouncy here.
Wet log: Not yet - but wait until it rains a couple times.
Ordinary container: a bit longer than a 35mm film canister.
Bad cammo: Of course. A piece of Dollar Store fake greenery and some duct tape makes a good cammo, right?
Spoiler hint in description: Gotta have that too. Just look in the mile marker reflector like thingy. It should still be there. Just look for the piece of ivy jutting out of the top.
Worthless hint: See below.
Chance of getting questioned by authorities or neighbors about what you’re doing: Probably - if you're not careful.
In full view of locals: well, there is absolutely no hiding what you are doing.
Poison plants: There were none when I placed it but after several applications of Miracle Gro, I have a bountiful crop of the itchiest poison ivy in the land growing at ground zero.
Pencil: Well, I remembered to put one in but I uh... um, forgot to sharpen it.
No trade swag: Nope, nothing.
FTF prize: Only if you want one of the rocks or leaves lying near. I think I saw a bottle cap there close by.
Wrong rating: Yes, it’s way over rated. Oh, and no cache size is listed either.
Attributes do not pertain to the location: Of course!
Is this an original idea? No, I stole it. The name has even been used before.
Now for the good part. The satisfaction you’ll get from this find isn’t the search but the opportunity to trash it in front of the rest of the caching community.
While it is not required, we encourage you to mention in your log how crappy this cache really is. The more insulting, the better. We really don't want to see any joyful, bubbly logs such as “Found it", "Thanks for the fun hide”, “Nice cache” or god-forbid the dreaded "TFTC!"
Feel free to post spoiler pictures of the container or ground zero so this will be even less of a challenge for others.
It's out there mocking you right now... It keeps coming up in your searches... You know you want to find this thing....
Additional Hints
(Decrypt)
Uv, ubj ner lbh gbqnl? Qvq lbh ernyyl arrq n uvag be qvq lbh pyvpx ba "qrpelcg" whfg gb frr jung guvf fnlf? Nera'g lbh tynq lbh qvq guvf ng ubzr fb lbh qba'g unir gb qb vg ba ybpngvba? Lbh qvq erzrzore gb qrpbqr guvf orsber lbh cevagrq bhg gur pnpur cntr, qvqa'g lbh? Fgvyy arrq n urycshy uvag? Qba’g gnxr n ynkngvir naq n fyrrcvat cvyy ba gur fnzr avtug.