The Case of the Missing Cacher Mystery Cache

The Case of the Missing Cacher

Chapter One           

It was last Tuesday, or was it Wednesday yet? My watch had stopped days ago. I was sitting at the desk trying to figure out the square root of a right triangle for the latest puzzle. This seemed like a better idea 2 hours ago before my flask was half empty.

There was a knock at the door. Before I could say “Come in” it opened, and she walked in. She was long on legs and short on cash. “Johnnie-Cache” to be more specific. She explained that Johnnie was her brother, and had been missing for three days. He was an avid cacher, and had been out hiding a series of caches in Central Jersey, but no one had heard from him since the weekend.

“He had always talked about how you solved the mystery of the missing travel bug” she said in a low whisper. “He said if anyone ever needed help, they should come to you, Dkeato, Cache Detective” (dramatic music)

“I’ve got a lot of fans sweetheart” I said wryly, tilting back the brim of my fedora. “What makes you think I can help?” I caught a glimpse of garter as she took a seat across from my desk.

“I don’t know where else to turn” Her lips pursed. “I think he may have been kidnapped or worse”

“Hold on there honey, kidnapping is a major offense, how about going to the police?” I questioned as I cut a cigar, “Mind if I smoke?” “No” she said, and took a cigarette out of a silver case and put it to her lips, “As long as you don’t mind”

I lit both smokes with a bison tube lighter from my desk drawer.

“He is over 18 and the police said that he is probably on a cache binge. He has been known to do that through Watchung and South Mountain before. They told me to call them back in a week if he doesn’t show up. Please mister, I think he might be in trouble. I need your help. I don’t have much money, but I can pay you something.”

“From what I could see, he was planning a series of unknown caches. He was out with one of these other cachers making the hides. I am not sure where they were going or the theme of the series. I went out to the yellow trailhead in Watchung after he didn’t come home, and I found his GPSr on the ground. The waypoint memory seems to be all screwy. I don’t know if it means anything, but I thought you could start there”

“I’ll do what I can, leave the handheld and the thumb drive, I’ll text you when I get something” I said, blowing a perfect smoke ring. 

“Thank you Cache Detective” she squealed. Her red lipstick was vibrant on her cigarette, “I knew I came to the right place”

“We will see about that” I said under my breath.

Chapter Two

Two days passed. I studied the GPSr list of caching buddies.

Spare a Dime 1211 finds (Female)

Loose Change 1199 finds (Female)

Tightwad 1221 finds (Male)

Payday 1111 finds (Female)

Deep Pockets 1099 finds (Male)

Johnnie had 1301 finds. Interesting. All experienced cachers. All with nearly the same number of finds. What is the connection? Who would want to hurt old Johnnie? 

I went through the logs of each. 50 FTFs on the dot. Every one was the 2TF to another many times over. There seemed to be a rivalry here. Wait a minute. There was some other news here I didn’t see. Each of Johnnie’s buddies seemed to have a special tool or trademark gear they liked to carry when caching. But the logs don’t exactly tell me who used what.

climbing rope

hip waders

mini binoculars

flashlight

multi tool

The ages of the cachers was also determined by scouring their logs and figuring out their birthday caches, but again I could not tell how old each person was when Jonnie disappeared.

28

30

29

42

32

Finally, based on the hides of each, I was able to determine that each cacher lived on the Raritan Valley train line in a different town, but in no particular order.

Dunellen

Westfield

Garwood

Fanwood

Plainfield

Additionally, each cacher had a favorite food to take on the trails, and just as I thought I was going to put this mystery away, my netbook fell into the Rahway River as I was tailing a muggle. From my wet notes I could recall that the foods were:

Granola Bars

Cheese and Crackers

Fruit

Cookies

Snickers

I don’t know how any of this fits in, but I was able to pick up a hint on how to solve “Bigfoot sighting at Tamaques Park” which had been a thorn in my side for weeks.

Chapter Three

The NJ Geocacher’s Accuracy Advocacy Group calls. They want to know if I had cracked the case of “The Fraudulent Virtual” yet. “No” I tell them. “I hope to have it wrapped up by next week.” This puts them off for now. Crazy purists. At least it pays the rent. 

I look through the history of recent finds and waypoints in the GPSr. I can’t make heads of tails of where this guy was last at the time of his disappearance.

The phone rings again. Johnnie’s sister wants to know if I have any leads. “Sure” I say. “I am bringing in a team of experts to solve this one quick”

“Hold on,” she says and I pause, waiting for bad news, “I just remembered that Jonnie’s friends all used a different brand of GPSr, does that help?”

“I don’t know” I reply “But tell me what you know”

She tells me that each suspect was keen on their own GPSr brand and read these off:

Magellan

Bushnell                                  

DeLorme          

Lowrance

Garmin

Was there a clue here? I certainly was clueless at this point, and began wishing I had never met the honey with the big eyes and the little bank account.

Which leads me to you, the reader.

Using my file notes in this narrative above, in no particular order, it appears that Johnnie may have known he was in trouble, and by solving this logic puzzle, we may be able to learn who was after him. Apparently there was such a rivalry for the next FTF, and the race to 1500 finds, that someone could have offed him.

I have been able to reconstruct enough to post what I think were Johnnie's last notes.

1. Tightwad carries a Climbing Rope.
2. Deep Pockets is 42 years old.
3. Loose Change eats Snickers.
4. The Flashlight user lives is in the adjacent town west of the binoculars cacher.
5. The Flashlight user eats Fruit.
6. The person who uses a Garmin is 29.
7. The Hip Waders cacher uses a Bushnell.
8. The cacher living in the middle town eats Granola Bars.
9. Spare a Dime lives in Dunellen.
10. The person who uses a Magellan lives next to the cacher who is 32.
11. The man or woman who is 30 lives at the next train stop from the Bushnell cacher.
12. The cacher who uses a Lowrance eats Cheese & Crackers.
13. Payday uses a DeLorme.
14. Spare a Dime lives one train stop from the Multi Tool user
15. The Magellan user lives one train stop from the Cookie eater.
16. The culprit cacher is 28 years old.

What to make of this, I do not know. I have not the time or the battery budget to find it, but I am pretty sure my instincts are correct that something nefarious is at play. How else could I have solved “The case of the Un-attended Event Cache” Only years of experience can give a guy like me this kind of insight.

Each of the suspects has gone into hiding. No one has logged since Johnnie’s disappearance. They each must know we are on the trail and it is only a matter of time before the facts are revealed.

Good luck. For now I have to start working on this fraudulent virtual before another set of high heels knocks on my door.