The Adventure Of Essie Turtlehaunch, Chapter III
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As we return to our heroine Essie Turtlehaunch of Toxteth, England, we find her pooring over a letter from her nephew-in-law, twice removed (from every pub in Kidneypuddle, England) (thats just below Liverpool). It turns out that Angus "Two Doors" Magee (her nephew) is holding a wet bowling shirt contest in Pasadena, California and he wants to know if she can officiate a Play Doh shots competition afterwards. She's decides to accept but hates airports ever since they wouldn't let her through the metal detector with her mechanical leg. She doesn't need it to walk, it's just that ever since she lost her lucky rabbit's foot she carries the leg for good luck at the craps tables. It's also good in the garden against snails.
She calls to let Angus know by leaving a message with his parole board, then packs her bags, goes out front and hails a cab. The cabby dofts his cap (dofting is allowed in England) and says to her "'ow do you do madam, me name's Barntd Antwerp. I'll be your cabby this evening and I'm Flemish".
Essie replied "Yes I noticed and would you turn your head when you speak, dear" as she wiped her forhead off.
They haggled on a price to Pasadena and as luck would have it (thanks to the mechanical leg) Barndt was going to pick up a fair to Chatsworth anyway. Loading the bags in the cab (including Essie) they take off North through Bootle trying to get to the M65 before traffic picks up. On the way Barndt notices that they are low on headlamp fluid and asks Essie if they could stop at a PIEP Boys just outside of Reykjavik to pick up a couple of pints (and a bottle of headlamp fluid). Essie agrees, but only if he snags a pint for her also.
It was cold and dark in the parking lot when they pulled in so Essie decided to stay in the cab and watch Late Night With Letterman at the HDTV/Expresso bar (she liked the free chimichangas in there too). During a wordless monologue (writers strike) there was an ominous tapping at the side window. Peering through the window Essie notices that out in the dark loomed four tall figures in yellow trimmed mauve cloaks with the hoods pulled over there heads. One of the figures came forward and raised a clenched hand towards the window...suddenly the cab went dark...a shot rang out...somebody screamed!!!
CONTINUED ON NEXT CACHE
abg va gur ohfu!