While visiting Cousin Jethro who done joined the Air Force and is stationed a Dover Airbase, we decided to see if Delaware is ready for a true Kountry kash
Only Kountry will be spoken here! Fancy city talk or yuppie logs will be deleted. If’n yo not a good ole boy, we don’t want y’all on our pit crew. No city slicker light pole crap here. Dis baby is out in the woods.
Bring your dawgs, but leave your rifle on the rack of yo pick-up—the law is mighty sensitive about shooting varmits here.
We thought this would be the biggest kash in Delaware cause Cousin Jethro can git them special cannon shell boxes that are great for moving moonshine, but since lernt that there is another giant ammo box kash up near the Pa line.
How to tell if you are kountry enough to git this kash
1. Do you enjoy eating possum and any fresh road kill?
2. Do you think a quarter horse is a ride out in front of Wal-Mart?
3. Do you think sub-division is part of a math problem?
4. Are the last words to the Star spangled Banner “Gentleman, start your engines”?
5. Do you enjoy a six pack and watching the bug zapper?
6. Do you thing the OJ trial was a Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test?
7. Do you think that TACO BELL is the Mexican Phone Comnpany?
8. Do you think a stock tip is advise on worming your hogs?
9. Was your mostest favorite show ever Hee_Haw?
10. Do you think that Dom Perigon is a mafia leader?
11. Do billboards that read “SAY NO TO CRACK” remind you to pull up your jeans?
If y’all answered yes to:
6 or more: Yo a good old boy Git-r-don
3-5 You have some country Enjoy the kash
1-2 There’s hope for you Give it a try
If you scored 0, you are too yuppie and should go do some wimpy shopping center micros.
We looked for some mountains in Delaware, but the best we could come up with was some wimpy little hills at a place called Middle Run. Y'all need a few miles walk into the woods, but around here after two miles you done gon thru the woods and come out theother side. Cause of that we had to make it a multi-kash. You get a chance to see a little fishn hole at a stream (part 1), a hidden catfish pond (part 2) and end up in nice pine forest that is micro in size compared to pine forest back home in Tennessee.
For y’all that want it, there a is nice bushwhacking and fording a stream between part 1 and 2. For the not quite so kountry, stay on the trail and go a little further north where you don’t need to bushwhack and you can cross the stream on the fancy yuppie bike bridge that replaced the old hippy-hop stone crossing! After you git the second part and go fo thebig kash, its mostly bushwhacking since da bikers keep changing the trails. . Total walk will be almost 2.5 miles. You can bushwhack to make it shorter. After you find the big kash, bushwhack to the yuppie bridge and ifn yo lucky you will find the old trail.
Cousin Jethro don’t remember names quite right, but from what he don told us, it looked like it be a race for FTF tween Debbie Jo (got to be a fine kountry gal), Little Trumpet, MuskRot TwoWoodCutters, 64Programs, DARN OGRES, BaitBabe, TallBalz and HopToad.
Cousin Jethro picked the last 10 feet of Part 2 just fo the kacher called StickerBoy to make him what he likes
The final Kash is at:
39 Deg 42."X"99 and 75 Deg 43."Y"02
Stage 1 Start your hike at the end of Delaplane Road (off Rt 2 by Pizza Hut east of Newark) where there is an itty bitty access trail with a sign tween two yuppy houses. Stage one has most of final coordinates. Since muggles dun got the first stage once before, you can also do stage 1 another way. Look for the red number on the tree, that is "Y"
Stage 2 has one final number , "X" for final stage coordinates on a tree. In case you dont have waypoint for stage 2, it is N 39° 42.261 W 075° 43.373