A Series of Unfortunate Caches:The Austere Academy Mystery Cache

Dear Cacher

If you have insisted on continuing with this dismal series of agony and woe, then you clearly need to get a job. It is my duty to place each cache as a token to each of the Baudelaire orphans' miserable years escaping the dreaded Count Olaf, but you have no such obligation. It would be better for you, and the park service which is forever rescuing lost geocachers from the barren land of Nevada, if you were to stay home, sniffing cakes.

Instead of daring the long trek to find an unfinished invention, thorns in your shoes, and a jumble of useless trinket’s that no one uses anyway, you should find a corner to sit in and think of the horrible things that could happen to you if you were to take this journey. All in all, you would find any boring preoccupation to be better than this dreary sojourn through uncharted lands. You would be far better closing this screen immediately and pretending you had never seen it, than to endeavor to discover the meanings of the ever vague hints given to you.

With all due respect

LS