While brooding atop Mount Salsa because he can't find a pirate
ship, Mosey the Pirate captain receives some advice from the Flying
Spaghetti Monster in the form of ten stone tablets. These were
called the "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts" by the FSM, the
"Commandments" by Mosey, and the "Condiments" by his Pirate gang.
While there were originally ten "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts",
two were dropped on the way back down the mountain, with eight
remaining. This event "partly accounts for Pastafarians' flimsy
moral standards". The FSM's commandments address the treatment of
people of other faiths, worship of the FSM, sexual conduct, and
nutrition.
1. I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious
holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some
people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain.
Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.
RAmen,
Mr. & Mrs. Wisearse.