Terminating the undead
While destroying a zombie may be simple, it is far from easy. As
we have seen, zombies require none of the physiological functions
that humans need to survive. Destruction or severe damage of the
circulatory, digestive, or respiratory system would do nothing to a
member of the walking dead, as these functions no longer support
the brain. Simply put, there are thousands of ways to kill a
human—and only one to kill a zombie. The brain must be
obliterated, by any means possible.
A. Disposal
Studies have shown that the virus that infects a healthy human and
turns them in to a zombie, Solanum, can still inhabit the body of a
terminated zombie for up to forty-eight hours. Exercise extreme
care when disposing of undead corpses. The head in particular
possesses the most serious hazard, given its concentration of the
virus. Never handle an undead corpse without protective clothing.
Treat it as you would any toxic, highly lethal material. Cremation
is the safest, most effective way of disposal. Despite rumors that
a pile of burning corpses will spread Solanum in a cloud of smoking
plague, common sense would dictate that any virus is unable to
survive intense heat, to say nothing of an open flame.
B. Domestication?
To reiterate, the zombie brain has proved, so far, to be
tamper-proof. Experiments ranging from chemicals to surgery to
electromagnetic waves have yielded negative results. Behavioral
modification therapy and other such attempts to train the living
dead like some kind of pack animal have similarly met with failure.
Again, the machine cannot be rewired. It will exist as is, or it
will not exist at all.
Please report back to DOZE HQ with any information
gathered.
Congrats to CoupleOCachers for first to find... and at night! I
wish I could give bonus points for that.