Do We Need to Find these Lost Books?
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The cache is not at the published location, but it is a good place to start! You will need to read further to find the actual location. Please be aware this cache may only be available Mon-Thurs: 9am-9pm, Fri-Sat 9am-5pm, Sunday hours vary by season. It has been placed with permission, and remember to be very, very quiet.
*** Gratz to Mom an'em on the First to Find ***
My teacher, Mike, is infamous for extolling the virtues of knowledge gained through reading. Not the kind of fragmented reading that wears your mouse out scrolling down, but the osmosis of information that involves a book and turning of pages! “We can’t go through life getting all our answers through Google searches” he says, handing me a dilapidated slip of paper that looked like it had been in his sweaty pocket for generations. “I need you to help me find some lost books. I’ve been looking for them for some time now”
I owed him some favors for helping me out earlier. It would be a losing battle to resist, so I started to type “www.amazon.com.” Mike instantly slapped me upside the head. “To the Library,” he commanded, “where knowledge is power and books are free!”
Walking in, I was mesmerized by the sheer volumes of books available! “When I was your age, I had to REFer to the card catalogue! Today you can simply use the SWAN online catalogue,” he instructed. I was going to ask how that was any better than a Google search but thought better of it.
I glanced down at the scrap of paper. The ink was running as if it had a train to catch and the handwriting was somewhere between chicken’s scratch and a doctor’s prescription. Straining my eyes, I could make out the following:
Everything in the Universe: This pocket sized book is a general encyclopedia containing brief practical designations on anything and everything imaginable. If it’s not in here, you don’t need to know it. Completely indexed and annotated
Author: Douglas Adams
Publisher: Universal Publishing
To Steal a Daisy: A collection of Irish Folk Limericks on the topics of the great outdoors. This book may not be very long, but that isn’t necessarily wrong. You can read about trees, nature, birds and bees, and sing it to a catchy little song!
Author: Unknown
Publisher: Irish Press
The Thrill of Hunting: A somewhat barbaric and violent guide advocating the use of expensive gimmicks and overwhelming tactics to capture a single Geococcyx. The author advises that the methods described in this book are only to be attempted by professionals. He assumes no liability for third degree burns, spinal fractures, decapitations, accidental poisonings, dismemberments, disembowelings, silhouette-shaped holes in walls, explosive flatulence, nosebleeds, high blood pressure, deranged mental conditions or any other injury as a result of improper application of his techniques.
Author: Willey Coyote
Publisher: Warner Brothers
Texting 4 dummies: The evolution of a new dialect in the English language. Ever catch urself saying “lol”. OMG then this is 4 u! A gr8 reed! Tranls8 back and 4th.
Author: Denver Ulysses Mandrake-Bartholomew
Publisher: First Publishing
Discovery of the Corporation: A documentary on the evolution of the legal construct of the Corporation and its inevitable rise to personhood. Once a simple business structure designed as an instrument for amassing vast wealth without the troublesome bother of personal responsibility; the corporations have now taken their rightful place as the rulers of society!
Author: NWO Corp, Inc.
Publisher: New Order Books
Maternal Anatidae: The study of ducks and their family instincts. Is it environmental or genetic? If it quacks, floats, and weighs as much as a witch, it’s a duck!
Author: Mother Goose
Publisher: Natures Log
89 ways to solve a Rubik’s Cube: The logic behind puzzles. This book explores critical thinking patterns most often used to decipher the seemingly indecipherable. Look both high and low for solutions to complex problems.
Author: Dude Einstein
Publisher: Random House
The Secret Sect of Geocaching: This book investigates the strange new religion of Geocaching, and their confounding customs! You will learn how to discover when and where their classified meetings are held, and how to infiltrate and participate!
Author: O. L. Rocker
Publisher: Log Book Co.
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