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Provide no exercise – the cache hider might make you just stand on a bridge after walking less than a tenth of a mile and laugh while you burn hours pulling bolts out of guardrails, examining wads of gum on the sidewalk with your bare hands, and removing expansion joints between concrete sections without so much as a treadmill to let you get in a workout during your search.
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Provide no view – who wants to look at a cat's hind parts while searching for a cache. Or have to look at a pile of rocks. Or stare at a telephone pole. Or a stop sign.
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Provide no witticisms on the cache page – the cache hider might just say something like “Nothing much to write home to mother about. Just another park and not so fast grab multi.”
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Provide no bushwhacking or thorn gouging opportunities – seriously, who wants to walk on a nice paved path or have no option of falling into a pile of rocks at the edge of a lake after pulling a briar out of your cornea?
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Provide no cover from the laughing eyes of onlookers – how many times have you stood on a bridge looking dumbfounded searching for a cache only to be laughed at by local groundskeepers driving by on golf carts.
Well, ladies and gentlemen of the caching community, I am here to rectify this situation. If you're tired of suffering through situations like those described above when searching for a 3 difficulty or higher cache hidden by some wiseguy cacher without your best interests in mind, your prayers have been answered. This 4 difficulty cache will give you a very nice view while you take a break from searching for this cache – it might even be a nice place for a picnic. There is plenty of bushwhacking and thorns on the way to the cache – in fact, I believe there might a be a bonus of rusty barbed wire in the area. There are rocks to trip and fall on, gulleys you could fall into, and plenty of rotten logs to twist an ankle on. Don't worry about muggles watching you – you'll be very secluded, only the occasional boater going by might be able to lay eyes on you. And you will get some exercise - count on it!
So, my caching friends, I have fixed the problems that are common among tricky hides by certain cache hiders. Don't forget to pack a lunch – you might be there awhile (see, a caching witticism).
Permission for this cache obtained from ODNR