Nocona's Echo Spanks the Staunton River Liar Traditional Cache

First, the obligatory required warning:

The cache is on the property of the US Army Corps of Engineers (with the necessary permission). Hunting, fishing and other muggle activity are allowed also. So be sure to take proper precautions while seeking it. Have PFDs for each person, wear blaze orange during hunting seasons and be safe. Remember too, that when you seek this cache you may find yourself in dangerous circumstances. Take care.

This cache was hidden during a day of awesome fun on the river. We paddled (spanked) the river, swam, played in the shade, laughed, talked... well, all sorts of things including hiding a cache.

So, to claim a smiley here, spank the river liar!

Tell all about your crazy journey in the best tall tale you can come up with. A "TFTC" just won't do your mission justice. Logs like that will not be accepted except with lots of derisive laughter, hoots and catcalls.

If you really want to find this one, reread the title for a hint.