Customer: How much is that duck?
Shopkeeper: Ten dollars.
Customer: Okay, could you please send me the bill?
Shopkeeper: I'm sorry, but you'll have to take the whole bird.
A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, "Do you have any chapstick?"
When the pharmacist hands it to him, the duck replies, "Thanks, just put it on my bill."
Q: What time does a duck wake up?
A: At the quack of dawn!
Q: What do ducks get after they eat?
A: A bill!
Q: What do you call a crate full of ducks?
A: A box of quackers!
Q: Who stole the soap?
A: The robber ducky!
Q: What do you call two ducks and a cow?
A: Quackers and Milk.
Q: What do you get if you cross a duck with fireworks?
A: A firequacker!
Q: What's another name for a clever duck?
A: A wise quacker!
Q: What has webbed feet and fangs?
A: Count Duckula