DPL Series: Executive Branch Challenge Mystery Cache

My Fellow Earthicans:

As part of our ongoing effort to capitalize on the Furon occupation of Sol-III, your government (the one you were tricked into electing) has designed a special volunteer program to identify Hoomans with the juiciest… er…. largest cranial capacities able to aide us in solving our on-going "nutritional challenges".

To ensure we are recruiting only the highest, grade-A minds, our supreme executive branch has crafted a simple challenge to separate the weak and malleable from the enriched and grass fed.

Those of you lucky enough to become a steaming half-cup of pumpkin-spiced, disoriented matter— I mean… to help us fill our millions of gurgling digestive tracts, will forever have the belched translation of their names echoed throughout the hallowed halls of alien appreciation (until the next meal time, that is).

CHALLENGE QUALIFICATIONS

In order to qualify for this special program (and be able to log a find on this CHALLENGE CACHE) you MUST provide evidence of finding at least THIRTY (30) geocaches whose names contain at least one of the following words or a related variation (singular or plural, used in an acronym, etc.):

Addendums, provisos, and quid pro quos:

• Acronyms that spell any of the above words in the cache title are acceptable
• Acronyms in the title that incorporate any of the above words are also acceptable (e.g. DPL = Denver Public Library)
• Special CO bonus: If you own any geocaches that meet the above qualifications and were published PRIOR to the date of this cache, you may count them toward this challenge
• All past finds that qualify may be counted toward this challenge
• Demonstrate your qualifications for this challenge using a Shared Public List or by posting your qualifying GC numbers (with Cache Names)
• You do not need approval to find/log the cache. Go find the cache if you qualify - just make sure to post your qualifications

LOCATING THE LOGGING UNIT

The logging unit is located at the secret headquarters for the Furon executive branch, near the coordinates above. Proceed to the starting location and locate the facility placard, firmly-affixed within the airlock, behind the outer portal. Locate the date, converting it into the following:

D=Two digit month of year
E=Two digit day of month
F=Four digit year

Now proceed into the inner facility and turn right at the staffed command post. Along the western wall, you will find the EHBU (Emergency Holographic Bernie Unit). His holographic projector is having intermittent issues, so he may appear slightly disembodied. Locate the "dedication date" at the bottom of his holographic pedestal. Convert this date into the following:

A=Two digit month of year
B=Two digit day of month
C=Four digit year

Using the information above, create numeric sequence derived from writing the values for A B C D E F, in alphabetical order, to lead you to the final phase.

01 Under the
02 top
03 Behind the
04 plant plus
05 30 paces to the
06 side
07 gargoyle, but not
08 garbage can on the left
09 fake unicorn behind the
10 179.84 degrees
11 south
12 Just past
13 munching
14 panel
15 tall
16 east
17 librarian
18 doctor
19 5 paces to the
20 north
21 91.88 degrees
22 two dictionaries
23 history of herbal tea
24 46.635
25 west
26 0.665
27 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097
28 north
29 TARDIS
30 58.218
1985 large, blue book
1986 rather burly librarian
1987 square, round hole
1988 with the toilet plunger
1989 under the copy machine
1990 in the parking lot
1991 45.567
1992 lamp skirt
1993 15 bloits
1994 ask the
1995 grizzly bear
1996 squirrel
1997 shelf with
1998 security desk
1999 no brute forcing the
2000 puzzle you cheater
2001 dried pasta
2002 water cooler
2003 false bottom
2004 sewer drain
2005 start crawling

INVESTIGATING BOTH COMPARTMENTS

The top compartment is intended for the logging apparatus only. Use this to volunteer for our new program. The bottom compartment may be used as storage for your trackable items, tradable goods, space worm rectal paste, etc.

When you have completed the signup process. Please return the items to their proper hiding places as your compliance in this matter will be vigorously monitored.

THANK YOU!

We appreciate your eagerness to participate in this exciting new opportunity and we hope you will be joining us for dinner soon! There will always be room for your Hoomans in the Furon dining hall… next to the candied worms.

Your beloved and appropriately-feared Furon Master,

Cryptosporidium-623

This cache series would not be possible without the enthusiastic and supportive help of the staff at the Denver Public Library! To celebrate the series, DPL has released a passport program! The first 200 geocachers to legitimately log the series, record the secret codes found within their geocaches, and turn in the completed passports will receive a special, limited-edition Denver Public Library Geocoin!

More information can be found on the DPL web site. Happy Caching!