Come right on in and welcome to Crazy Jack's Arborist Supply and Chili Dog Emporium. You have a problem with a tree you say, well, Crazy Jack's Arborist Supply and Chili Dog Emporium is the right place for you to be.
- Neighbor complaining about your tree blocking their view?
- Storm Damages to that special Bonsai?
- Illicit "Our Gang" style tree house in your prized magnolia?
- Perhaps one of your trees is in need of a check up?
Well, Crazy Jack's Arborist Supply and Chili Dog Emporium can help. We offer the newest in 19th century tree care implimentation. Don't waste your time at other dealers claiming their 20th century gizmos are better and more ecologically friendly. Our tried and true equipment has been certified by our on staff Tree Witc... Errr... Drui... Err, Enviromental Expert.
So, if you need an ax, a whip saw or even a tree thermometer, Crazy Jack's Arborist Supply and Chili Dog Emporium is in fact the place for you.
All equipment sold as is. No employee of Crazy Jack's Arborist Supply and Chili Dog Emporium is now, or likely ever has been outside of an urban enviroment. Use devices at own risk. Don't pet porcupines.