Pickle Trees and Big Bulls
Just down the road from here a few years back, there was nothing but ranches and cotton fields. A DEA officer stopped at one of these ranches, and talked with an old rancher. He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."
The rancher said, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there".
The DEA officer exploded saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me!"
Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher. "See this badge! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I freaking want on ANY land, no questions asked! Have I made myself clear?"
The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.
A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's enormous Santa Gertrudis bull......
With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that the officer would be gruesomely gored before he reached safety. He was clearly terrified.
The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....
"Your badge . . . show him your Freaking BADGE!!"
What's any of this have to do with pickle trees you ask? Well, the cache looks a whole lot like a pickle, of course. And we all know that, unlike money, pickles grow on trees.