The Ballad of The Devil & The ‘Dillo
The Devil came to Montana, he was looking for a soul to steal.
He was in a bind, cause he was way behind, he was willing to make a deal.*
When he came upon a geocacher on a trail and working it hot.
The Devil jumped up on a cottonwood stump & said: "Babe, let me tell you what:
"I guess you didn’t know it, but I’m a geocacher too.
"So if you’d care to take a dare I’ll make a bet with you.
"You hunt a pretty good cache, Sweetcheeks, but give The Devil his due.
"I’ll bet a geocache of gold against your soul as to say I’m better than you."
The cacher said "I’m The Roaming Armadillo, and it might be a sin,
"But I’ll take that bet; you’re gonna regret, ‘cause I’m the best that’s ever been."**
‘Dillo fire up your GPS and work that unit hard.
‘Cause hell’s come to Montana and The Devil cheats on logs.
If you win you get this shiny cache all made of gold.
And if you lose The Devil gets your soul.
The Devil opened up his phone and said "I’ll take this one"
Fire flew from his fingertips as he turned the compass on.
The Devil made a quick find upon arriving at GZ.
He singed the log with initials and, online, wrote T.F.T.C.
When The Devil finished, the ‘Dillo said "Well, you’re pretty good old son,
But you try to keep up with me now and I’ll show you how it’s done."
The ‘Dillo’s find was just as fast; she traded up & dried the cache.
Wrote her name down in a flash and, online, an original paragraph.
The Devil bowed his head ‘cause he knew that he’d been beat.
And laid the golden cache at The Roaming Armadillo’s feet.
The ‘Dillo said "Devil, just come on back if you ever want to try it again,
"I done told you once, you evil muggle, I’m the best that’s ever been."***
*Apologies to Charlie Daniels
**The author in no way believes this but, as a Texan, she can trash-talk with the best of them
***The author still doesn't believe this, but will acknowledge she does write good logs
That was some hunt, I tell you what! Things got pretty tense there for a while, but I was fired up and very motivated (he never should have called me "Sweetcheeks"). I wasn't battling just for myself--I was representing all of us geocachers and determined to do us proud.
My first thought after winning was to take that gold cache and run to find the nearest gold buyer. On second thought I decided that, since I stood for all geocachers in that battle, it would be more appropriate to hide it for all to find! (After all, it was y'all who taught me how to hunt and proper geocaching etiquette!) So I did, after first stuffing it with golden swag, of course.
I hope you've enjoyed my story and the golden cache. Remember: bring a pen; trade even or trade up; don't be afraid to perform light maintenance if needed; and always, ALWAYS write good logs (something besides "TFTC" or "Found it") -- you never know how high the stakes might be!
This gold lock-n-lock is just off Hilger Road, a very nice gravel road that starts off running parallel to the interstate. Take the Gates of the Mountains exit (Exit 209); Hilger Rd. is just east of the freeway ramps.