Patagonia recently learned of a mystery item she will inherit if she can fulfill the stipulations of Peter Pesky's will. Seems she must first travel(without her spouse, which will not be easy for our co-dependent Patagonia) to at least 13 countries including all of the continents.(see GCAGW8T-Mayday!)
Currently she is a bit short on both guts and cash for this mission. Where to go and when and how?
Her husband prompted her to get a job at an airline company. He wrote her resume, coached her about airlines and airports, and drove her to the interview. She ended up getting a job and eventually was given the opportunity to travel with free airfare. She psyched herself up to go on the available flight to New Zealand. Nothing like jumping in with two feet. Crazy far away. Go as far as possible while she had the job, her husband said.
Now Patagonia has always been a good mother. She knew that her son, Patrick, loves birds. So once she made it to New Zealand, she did her best to arrange to see the famous nocturnal kiwi bird. Somehow she found herself on a nighttime eco-hike where she did actually come across a kiwi. While the guide's back was turned, she snatched one up and hid it in her purple bag!
Now, everyone knows that you are absolutely not allowed to take wildlife from one country to another without applying for permission. Not to mention that the kiwi is recognized as an icon of New Zealand. The association is so strong that the term kiwi is used internationally as the colloquial demonym for New Zealanders. No way, no how, would they let one leave their land.
Patagonia just sort of thought about Patrick, at home learning about birds. At home trying to use his new camera to capture birds in flight. This kiwi was so cute, she knew it would be photogenic, if Patrick could learn how to take photos in the dark, when the kiwi is active. Plus it was flightless. It would be easier for him to practice photographing. It couldn't fly away from him and his camera.
So she sedated the cute guy and brought it onboard in her purple bag. Maybe because she was an employee, the guard just didn't check her bag carefully enough. Somehow she got home with her bird. Surprisingly, somehow the American guards didn't catch her either. She did have her airline uniform on and she did look, well, sort of benign. Maybe that was why.
She gave the bird to Patrick, who took it for a walk with his pet kitten. The kitten ended up attacking the bird. Patrick lost hold of the kiwi, which escaped into the nearby woods.
Patagonia mentioned this whole story to a co-worker on a lunch break, expecting sympathy. Instead, she got reported and fired.
We will be meeting Patagonia at Thompson Park, near a playground. Patagonia is looking for some new ideas for thrifty travel. Now that she is unemployed, she can do an afternoon brainstorming session. She will also raffle off a few trinkets and candies she brought back from New Zealand. Maybe she will bring along some kiwi fruit. Maybe someone will even find the escaped kiwi bird in the woods of Thompson Park!