Patagonia recently learned of a mystery item she will inherit if she can fulfill the stipulations of Peter Pesky's will. Seems she must first travel (without her spouse, which will not be easy for our co-dependent Patagonia) to at least 13 countries including all of the continents (see GCAGW8T-Mayday!).
Initially she was a bit short on both guts and cash for this mission. Where to go and when and how?
Her husband prompted her to get a job at an airline company. He wrote her resume, coached her about airlines and airports, and drove her to the interview. She ended up getting a job and eventually was given the opportunity to travel with free airfare. She psyched herself up to go on the available flight to New Zealand. Nothing like jumping in with two feet. Crazy far away. Go as far as possible, while she had the job, was her husband's theory.
Now, Patagonia has always been a good mother. She knew that her son, Patrick, loved birds. So once she survived the flight to New Zealand, she did her best to arrange to see the famous nocturnal kiwi bird. She signed up for a guided nighttime eco-hike, during which she did actually come across a kiwi! While the guide's back was turned, she snatched it up and hid it in her purple bag!!!
Well, of course everyone knows that you are absolutely not allowed to take wildlife from one country to another without applying for and obtaining permission. Not to mention that the kiwi is recognized as an icon of New Zealand. The association is so strong that the term kiwi is used internationally as the colloquial demonym for New Zealanders. No way, no how, would they let one leave their land.
Probably Patagonia wasn't really used to thinking on her own. Being co-dependent, she was used to having Prichard around to help her through life's tough choices. Give her advice. Sort of steer her in the right direction. So, she maybe didn't think things through properly. Maybe her brain was a little rusty. She just sort of thought about Patrick, at home learning about birds. At home trying to use his new camera to capture images of birds in flight. This kiwi was so cute, she knew it would be photogenic. If Patrick could learn how to take photos in the dark, when the kiwi is active, if would probably make for a frameable print. Plus it was flightless. It would be easier for him to practice photographing. It couldn't fly away from him and his camera, like all the other birds seem to be doing back home in New Jersey.
So, she sedated the cute feathery guy and brought it onboard in her purple bag. Maybe because she was an employee, the guard just didn't check her bag carefully enough. Somehow she got home with her bird. Surprisingly, somehow the American inspectors didn't catch her either. She did have her airline uniform on, and she did look, well, sort of benign. Maybe that was why.
She gave the bird to Patrick, who took it for a walk with his pet kitten in Thompson Park. The kitten ended up attacking the bird. Patrick lost hold of the kiwi, which escaped into the nearby woods.
Patagonia mentioned this whole story to a co-worker on a lunch break, expecting sympathy. Instead, she got reported and fired.
That is why Patagonia is back to looking for some new ideas for thrifty travel. Now that she is unemployed, she can do some brainstorming while walking around the park. At least until Prichard gets home from work and can help her plan. Maybe she can ask some people in the park for both ideas on furture travel and for help tracking down the wayward kiwi.
Well, at least that is one country and one continent down. Somehow without our Patagonia being jailed. But it was a close call. Whew!