CACHE IS NOT AT POSTED COORDINATES
"You expect me to believe there's a Daingerfield island and none of you (Alexandria-area cachers) have placed a puzzle there for Rodney? #Shame" was more or less the message Team Sedor18 received this morrning.
They're right, obviously. We totally get no respect
But that island is National Park land so the thought never ever crossed our mind. But hmmm, a puzzle cache with the final nearby? That could work. OK, here goes.
Your mission is to pick out the CORRECT finish to a classic Rodney Dangerfield joke amidst four possible punchlines. If you use the Google machine this one should be pretty simple to solve. Hopefully, these self-deprecating stingers will put a smile on your face.
You are solving for N3A BC.DEF W0GH JK.LMN
A. I’m so ugly, one time I stuck my head out the window...
a) And the neighbors called animal control (7)
b) And got arrested for mooning (8)
c) And the sun hid behind a cloud. (6)
d) And people started buying eclipse glasses (9)
B. I went to see my doctor. “Doctor, every morning I get up, look in the mirror and feel like throwing up; what’s wrong with me?” He said...
a) You're not sick, just honest (0)
b) Don't worry, I feel the same way when I see you (3)
c) I’m surprised you only feel like throwing up (5)
d) I don’t know But your eyesight is perfect (4)
C. I was so ugly my mother used to feed me...
a) With a slingshot (9)
b) In the dark to spare the mirrors (1)
c) With a mask on, just in case (0)
d) Under the table so the food wouldn't see me (8)
D. My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said...
a) Alright, you're also hopeless (4)
b) Alright, you're a lost cause (6)
c) Okay, you’re ugly too (7)
d) Okay, you're not just crazy, you're insane (8)
E. I tell ya, when I was a kid, my old man never liked me. He took me to the zoo. He told me...
a) To go over to the leopard and play connect the dots. (4)
b) See, you do have a family. (2)
c) Which exhibit do you want to live in? (6)
d) They have a new human exhibit, want to join? (5)
F. I know I’m ugly. My dog found out we look alike. He...
a) Started wearing a mask (8)
b) Started howling at me instead of the moon (4)
c) Killed himself (2)
d) Joined a witness protection program (6)
G. I tell ya, when I was a kid I had it rough. Once on my birthday, my old man gave me a bat...
a) But he used it to smash my piñata first. (6)
b) And told me to start training for the next robbery. (9)
c) And then he hit a home run—with my presents. (8)
d) The first day I played with it, it flew away. (7)
H. I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were...
a) A toaster and a radio (7)
b) A rubber shark and a piranha (6)
c) A brick and a weight (9)
d) A live eel and a mousetrap (8)
J. My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog...
a) Buries her leftovers in the backyard (6)
b) Volunteered for obedience school (5)
c) Begs for Alka-Seltzer (0)
d) Started pretending to be a vegetarian (1)
K. I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a finger to my father. He said...
a) Keep it, he owes me a manicure anyway (0)
b) He wanted more proof (2)
c) Don't worry, he has ten more where that came from (9)
d) Thanks, but I asked for a handwritten note (1)
L. I looked up my family tree...
a) And got lost in the branches (5)
b) And found three dogs using it (6)
c) And saw that someone had pruned the interesting bits (7)
d) And found out we're all nuts (8)
M. My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out.
a) I think she's aiming for a 'no returns' policy (2)
b) I guess I'm recyclable (4)
c) I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it (6)
d) I didn't realize 'taking out the trash' was code for 'marriage counseling (8)
N. I’m getting so old my insurance company sends me...
a) 1/2 a calendar (1)
b) A reminder to update my will (0)
c) A birthday card every month, just in case (2)
d) A lifetime achievement award every renewal (7)
CONGRATS TO SAMGAMGEE2001 FOR MAKING HIS 1,900th FIND HERE!