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BTW Mystery? Mystery Cache

This cache has been archived.

West Texas Reviewer: As there's been no cache to find for months, I'm archiving it to keep it from continually showing up in search lists, and to prevent it from blocking other cache placements.If the owner wishes to repair/replace the cache sometime in the future (not to exceed 15 days from the date of this entry), just contact me (by e-mail), and assuming it still meets the current Guidelines, I will consider unarchiving this cache.

Please be advised this is not a guarantee that this geocache will be unarchived. Many factors will go into my decision. The most important of which is how you responded to geocachers who tried to communicate with you regarding the problem(s) with this geocache hide and how you communicated with me, the West Texas Reviewer.

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Hidden : 1/2/2011
Difficulty:
2 out of 5
Terrain:
1.5 out of 5

Size: Size:   other (other)

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Geocache Description:

Unknown locations, terrain, and difficulty. This is the BONUS mysterycache you guys haven't been waiting for.....?

THE ABOVE COORDINATES ARE BOGUS!!!!
THE ABOVE COORDINATES ARE BOGUS!!!!
THE ABOVE COORDINATES ARE BOGUS!!!!

This cache was placed in honor of Bent Tree West neighborhood plus the school and the swim club that are smack dab in the center of it. I grew up here and thought it would be nice to have a cache nearby my roots. You'll find this cache to be different than all the other BTWs before it. This is a pretty mathematical mystery, so put your thinking cap and check your work!

Here are the Coordinates: N 32 59.(Variable G) W 96 50.(Variable F)

To solve the Mystery of BTW, you must solve the following equations or count certain values from previous BTW caches:
1. Count how many words are in the description of BTW Cache #1 (GC2A0B0) this is your A variable.*
2. Count how many stages are in BTW Bonus (GC2CX80) This
is your B variable.
3. Count how many attributes are in BTW Caches 2 through 5. This is your C variable.**
4. Subtract the number of attributes in BTW Cache #6 (GC2BF8B) from variable C. This is variable D**.
5. Multiply A by B. Then multiply that by 2. This is
Variable E.
6. Solve to find variable F. F = E + 86.
7. Solve to find variable G. G = F + 59.

This cache was placed in honor of Bent Tree West neighborhood. I grew up here and thought it would be nice to have a cache nearby my roots. This is the hopefully not last of an amazing series around this awesome neighborhood.
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(((((PUT YOUR TRAVEL BUGS HERE!!!)))))
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This Mystery is an unknown container hidden cleverly around the Bent Tree West area.

* Includes both long and short descriptions. Treat them as the "whole" description.

** Not including any (if applicable) "needs maintenance" attributes. Good luck.

Congrats to RAA for FTF!!!

You can check your answers on geochecker.com
(visit link)

Additional Hints (Decrypt)

[What? Where?] V pna'g gryy lbh. Inevnoyrf S naq T ner rnpu unir 3 qvtvgf.

Decryption Key

A|B|C|D|E|F|G|H|I|J|K|L|M
-------------------------
N|O|P|Q|R|S|T|U|V|W|X|Y|Z

(letter above equals below, and vice versa)