It's so lonely out here. All I do is stand here all day and all night, waiting for some company. Occasionally, the birds and squirrels stop by but all they do is chirp and chatter.
Will you come and visit me? If you do, unscrew my hat and see what's inside my head. Sign your name so I'll always remember our time together. (When you return my hat, please make sure my flowers line up so I don't look silly and the contents of my head stay warm and dry.)
If you're having trouble finding me, just whistle and I'll whistle back. (Though you'll only hear it if you are also a gnome.)
Oh, and be sure to stop in at the nearby paint store and say hello to Tracy. They also have free coffee!