Anteater

"A genuine anteater,"

The pet man told my dad.

Turned out, it was an aunt eater,

And now my uncle's mad!

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Found this nifty little spot while out performing cache maintenance in the area.

N you'll need to +533 to your answer.

W you'll need to -387 from your answer.

How you arrive at that answer may take some figuring out.

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You can validate your puzzle solution with certitude.