Some people think the first line of a novel can grab your attention and reflect the rest of the story to come. The annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest was inspired by Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, who in 1830 began Paul Clifford with the famous line "It was a dark and stormy night". The competition challenges people to write the most ridiculous opening line to a story that they can come up with. For example, the 2004 winning entry was:
"She resolved to end the love affair with Ramon tonight . . . summarily, like Martha Stewart ripping the sand vein out of a shrimp's tail . . . though the term "love affair" now struck her as a ridiculous euphemism . . . not unlike "sand vein," which is after all an intestine, not a vein . . . and that tarry substance inside certainly isn't sand . . . and that brought her back to Ramon." - Dave Zobel, Manhattan Beach, CA
This cache is a trading cache, but what you'll be trading is your literary skill. Once you find the cache container feel free in your log entry to leave your own Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest submission. There is a bench near the cache you can relax on while you create your literary masterpiece. Feel free to repeat it in your log entry here, or not if you want only those who find the cache to experience it.
Please be careful when you put the cache back that it won't fall out once the "camo" is slid back in place. This is a high traffic area (both pedestrian and vehicular; use the cross walks to access the area of the cache), so please try to avoid attention so the cache doesn't get muggled. We don't want all that literary genius to be lost. :)
If you need inspiration, you can check out entries on the contest home page here. You can also find some humourous (and apparently real) novel opening lines here and here.
If you enjoyed this cache, you might want to check out the other two parts of the Halifax Literary Trilogy: Hark! I Hear a Haiku! and So the Story Goes....